Monday, December 29, 2008

LOL

LOL LOL LOL

I have a feeling, just an inkling, that I'm getting better at this.

A



B



C
Mom saw me screwing (up) around with photoshop, so she gave me several challenges. 
The first was easy: give Summer Glau new makeup, a new haircut, and a brand-new dress. (Pic C) . EASY! The next was to turn the woman in Picture B into a 1920-1940's style movie star, make her look NO OLDER than 25, and turn her into a vampire. Harder. But, as you can see from photo A, I did it reasonably well. she looks a tad melted. I know. You should have seen here in color!!!!!!! Oh, fine... Next post, I'll give you the original summer and the color woman.

YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!

my mom yelled lawyer-style at the airport. Ten minets later?

*1812 overture*
Me: Hello?
TA Person: hello, is this a Miss Tizar-rey Zee-leg?
Me: Yea.. wassup?
TAP: Your bag should be at your house by midnight.
Me: Oh? It's on a plane?
TAP: No, on a truck. We had it in Denver all this time, but no-one wanted to look for it.
Me: well... thank you. Bye now! Stay shiny!
*click*

Sunday, December 28, 2008

godfuckingdammit

MORE THan A THOUSAND DOLLARS OF CLOTHES. they have lost ALL of my favorite clothes, makeup, shampoo, my razor, MY COMBAT BOOTS, my BRAND NEW SHIRTS, ALL the presents to my little cousins, all my underwear, three hundred dollars' worth of bras.... the list goes on. sympathy, please! I need a pity party.

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Ok, story Time Children!

Two days ago; kicked off as I am boarding. Today: get to the airport, delayed. Fine. Flight cancelled. Oh, and then because Chicago is a city no one ever goes to, and is totally in the middle of nowhere, no other flights are going there today. I was standing fifty feet from the plane I was supposed to board, and they say THERE ARE NO FLIGHTS.

It should be a federal offense, not letting a little girl see her family on Christmas.

Monday, December 22, 2008

Why Getting A Tounge Bath From A Puppy Is A Bad Idea

Now i'm sick. sick enough to feel like getting up to get another glass of tea is an Olympic effort. Sick enough to not register info coming into my head. sick enough so i cant think.

Sunday, December 21, 2008

what the FUCK

I was getting ON MY PLANE, then they said "we can't board you, it's ilegal to board a UM on the last connecting flight for the day"

couldn't they have told me earlier!?!? U know, while I was going through one of the million checkins they do?!

SHIT

trip postponed till tuesday

G'bye All!

I am off to Michigan!  There was a plane crash at DIA last night, so next you hear from me, I will be VERY cranky. And tired. And have almost zero internet. Check out bash.org's top 100 qoutes, though. Hilarious!
Anyways, if my plane crashes and burns to, throw me the biggest damn party known to mankind! And get Amanda Palmer & Brian Molko to show up, too. And Neil Cicirega. 

back to the land of the non-morbid....
my Zoloft hath taken away my ability to write, so shit. Sorry if I don't stay up to date on ur blogs... no internet!!! (Well, very little.)

Oh, and one last thing:

Sunday, December 14, 2008

I Want...


Betrayal at House On The Hill (if you can find that game, you're my personal savior and I will love you eternally) ((I'm serious)) (((No, Really))) ((((Pleeeeeeeaaaasssssseeeeeee? Pretty please with a vampire on top?))))

A non-confusing, totally awesome relationship where I don't feel like I'm the OGP at every party. (may not be scientifically possible, see chart) ((Edit: preferable around VDay... see last year's VDay rant)) ((( Left click on the chart above to see the full sized imagine, or a clicky here)))

To figure out what my goddamn gender preference is! (Also, may not be possible.)

A DECENT vampire novel (gotta love Anne Rice.. I only have Interview and Lestat) ((Or gen. dead))
there. My wish list. Happy, Eli?
On a completely and utterly useless note...
I got a hug for my birthday!!!! Badass!!! How do I write Benji a thank you note for a hug, though....
Passing...out....argh...
Oh, did I mention I'm on a low slope in my mood? Nothing you can do about it. Not triggered by anything. Low point in mood. so if I look REALLY bad one day (hygeine gets ignored when I'm depressed) write somewhere on my body that I have to bathe, put on my makeup, and wear Clearasil at night. And brush my teeth and hair. At least. My whole fancy routine is for when my mood is not dead. Also, if I'm missing, say, a shirt, please let me know. (I have done this before. Low points in mood and forgetfulness make strange bedfellows.)
So.. my possible super-pissiness and random bouts of crying/screaming/punching crap should be ignored and not taken personally. Please.
Al I want for Christmas is *mumble mumble mumble* *mumble mumble mumble*!


Thursday, December 4, 2008

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MEEEEEEEEEEE

Party: Saturday, 3:30 pm, mah house


Sorry, Andy, mom won't let u come.

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

This Is Not Very Good

I've been sitting in the exact same spot, surfing the web, for four days. And I'm not bored yet.
Is something horribly, horribly wrong with me? Help! I don;t want to waste my whole Thanksgiving sitting on my expanding ass looking at weird stuff on the web!
Give me something productive to dooooooo!!

I already cleaned my room, organized my backpack, went to the gym twice, took a bath, watched Battlestar Galactica, hung out with my cousins, found a great video/song, and wrapped presents.

I still need to practise my guitar, though.

What should I do to be productive?!

Saturday, November 22, 2008

Stuck Between The Try And Try And Get Asphyxiated

So yea... new glasses.... AM I REALLY THAT SHORT AND FAT?!?!?!


OMG, now that my depth perception is correct, everything looks different!

Saturday, November 15, 2008

Rawr

I don;t even know where to start. I mean, I ask my mom to find me a cord that's HERS and in HER ROOM, and the FIRST thing she does is go storming into my room, throwing crap everyuwhere and "cleaning" when really all she does is hand me shit and say "put these in the trash!" so now I have like none of my crap and she's all "I can't find your cord, so I guess you'll never get to use the camera again." I said "I need to go into m y room and be ALONE" SHE was like *eye roll* "FINE! BE LIKE THAT!"
so can you tell i'm in a rip-everyone's-head-off mood? Fantasies of jumping out this window right now and leaving forever batter my mind... I'm not part of the solution, I'm part of the problem and the way you get rid of problems is deleteing them. FUCK!!!! I just need some friends who'll fucking be fucking NICE to me and get along with each fucking other and not fucking make fun of me or kick me or make me feel like SHIT for expressing myself and who'll not ask me every twelve godammed fucking seconds if I'm ok because I'm NOT OK but I dont want to fucking talk about!!!!!

I mean, I made a really really UNBELIVABLELY stupid decision, and I can't tell anyone, not even like my cousins, because FUCK it was so dumb and now I'm not.... well anyways, now I have to lie a bunch more and I can't tell anyone I can't tell anyone you better not tell anyone you little slut or I will rip you fucking head of you whore! All you want is sex, right? Slut!!!!

You didn't even enjoy it, did you? No, you didn't even KNOW them and they violated 47 of Tizri's Crimes Against Humanity and there were no fireworks and not even a crush there and oh god you whore why did you do this to me?!

It wasn't Edward and Bella or even Bella and Jacob, it was Bella and random guy in big city alley huh? SLUT I can't even BELIVE you fuck you I'll kill you all


I'LL KILL YOU ALL

I'LL KILL YOU ALL I'LL KILL YOU ALL AND YOU'LL BE DEAD AND I CAN MAKE BROWNIES AND PRETEND I'M STILL OK AND I CAN MAGICALLY STOP EATING JUNK AND BRUSH MY TEETH AND MABYE OH I DON'T KNOW MABYE MAKE IT STOP FEELING LIKE EVERY BREATH IS LIKE TRYING TO LIFT EIGHT HUNDRED POUND WEIGHTS!

Help me please. I can't do this anymore. Stop the planet of the apes, I want to get off! Everyone's acting like nothing's happened when EVERYTHING'S hasppened and oh my god and shoot me know bullet to the brainpan SQUISH haha!!!! then it'll all be gone and I'll be happy I can NEVER date again, let alone think about NO DONT THINK ABOUT IT DONT DONT DONT DONT please god make me a stone!

please, god, if you are merciful, let me erase this one mistake, because it's made me hate myself. 

I'll never be pure again. I'm a..........................................

I DONT EVEN KNOW ANYMORE GOD HELP ME PLEASE!!!

Let me die. Or let me erase my mistakes.

Let there be another chance at hope, or beauty. I fear I'll be hitting 200 pounds soon unless I can get over it.

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

OH MY GOD

I need glasses now... :(

and I'm gonna move not to Forks but to Washington DC in like 10-11th grade!

NOOOOOOOO


I claim all rights to stories inspired by the song!


Wednesday, November 5, 2008

Prop 8

The gay marriage ban....


its....



passed. All those marriages are now nullified. As in "good job marrying, too bad we won't let you."
Oh!!! I forget who, but some1 in one of those "civil union" states said, actually said, this to a gay man:
Jerk Guy:"So... did you and your partner just get a civil union?"
Gay Man: "Yup!"
Jerk Guy: "That's wonderful! That should tide you over until you settle down and find a nice girl!"




SYMPATHY, PLEASE!!!!

I'm so, so, so, so sorry Andy about the prop 8 passing. :( Tell ur dad and Matt that I give them big mental hugs and fudge!

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

LiveBlog of the campaing

7:08 COLORADO POLLS CLOSE!!!! not a whole bunch in yet. Colorado and Florida are what we're watching. Words are thrown around. It's all very chaotic and confusing.

7:12 I'm flocking hungry.... X( Lady with a HORRIBLE fake tan fills airspace. We got a slight chink in the stream coverage, so we turn to the other computer, then right back to the original laptop. Choreographed to the nth degree, LOL. Looks like a Monty Python sketch.

7:15 Some ppl scream "2004!!!!" some say "2000!!!!!!!". I say... Cthulhu/Glados 2012! You will be served cake and madness!

7:20 WHERE THE HELL IS MY PIZZA I'M HUNGRY!!!!!!!!!!!???????????

7:21 PIZZA!!!!!!!!

7:22 Go Ohio! One of the deciding states in 04 is going blue.... whoa. I am shocked. Ohio. IS. GOING. BLUE. That is BIG. Lots more caps lock 2nite, I promise, loyal fans! :)

7:46 Augh!!! Cali closes at 9. Not much... rawr.... so hard to wait....

8:10 Admendment 48, the one that would ban abortion and birth control, because, you know, it'd kill clumps of cells, like you do every day. Well, anyways.... IT LOST!!!!! YAY!!!!!!

8:31 this is getting stupyfyingly boring.

9:00 fuck this. I'm tired.

9:04 OBAMA WON!!!! THE RACE IS OVER!!!!!!!!!!!!





OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG!!!!!!!!


wwwoooooooooo!!! LET THE SCREAMING BEGIN!!!!!


Monday, November 3, 2008

I BEAT PORTAL

AND I DOWNLOADED THE SONG AND I BEAT THE GAME AND DID I MENTION  I BEAT THE FUCKING GAME I BEAT THE GAME DID I TELL YOU I BEAt the game and i got a song and i HAD A CAKE TODAY!!!!

Unknown Author

She will never know that I cry myself to sleep almost every night because I'm so in love with her.

tags: love, bisexuality, depression, best friends.




I donno, I like it.

Sunday, November 2, 2008

Pictures!!!!




Okay, so at the tail end of last year (the school year, that is) my mom bought REALLY tight pants so I could see how much weight I'd lost. Anyways, I threw 'em on today figuring they'd no longer even vaugely fit (I've gone from 168 to 150 to 183 lbs. This is what dieting does!!! DONT DO IT!!!!!!!!) and well, surprise surprise: they were really loose! Look at how much I can pull them off me one handed! See how loose they look even when I've pulled them away!?!??! and my flat(er) tummy is ah-mah-zing!!!

How did this happen!??!? I didn;t get any taller I GAINED weight: I've been packing on the RediWhip and cookies! How? How?!?!? YAY!!!!!

WWOOOOOOOotttttTTTTT!!!! This is fucking awesome! Valentine's day here I come!!!

Epic Failure

Here we go........


he's asked a wonderful, thoughtful question. He gives a really weird and irrelevent awnser. Just wanted to see what the "other side" has to say.

Saturday, November 1, 2008

201st post!




sorry, forgot to mention that last post was my 200th! WoOt!


okay. so, I JUST finished Portal. I beat the game!!!!!! :) :) :) :D :D :D i'm so happy I could just pass out!!!!! I got congradulations brownies, too! I know, i know, it's supposed to be cake, but Ali can't make cake so she made me brownies.

Oh, if you don't own Portal go buy the Orange Box RIGHT NOW. It has 4 games for the price of 1!! Oh, and I'm NOT gonna help u on Portal. the fun is figuring it out urself.

i will tell you this, though: LISTEN TO WHAT THE COMPUTER SAYS. LOOK AT EVERY PICTURE ON THE WALLS, FLOOR, WHATEVER. EXPLORE AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE. AND NEVER, EVER, EVER FORGET TO LOOK UP!!!!


to win portal you will need:
- two hands
- motion sickness pills
- a pillow to punch/scream into
- ears
- good speakers
- a brain, for thinking
- Portal

Instructions: Combine all ingredients on the nearest internet connenected computer. play for 4-6 hours, or until done.

ENJOY!!!!!

Monday, October 27, 2008

Friday, October 24, 2008

Well

I got Kenya back up and running! Her keyboard makes the BEST clunk-clunk-clikity-clikity-clunk-clunK!!!!!!

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

Ruddolf the red hot reindeer!!

Here we go

I Think

I just lost all my friends.





Well

Anya broke up w. me. Oh well. Like my stickers?

Saturday, October 18, 2008

My Baby!!!

Isn't it cute???!!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!?? Gonna keep the sex a secret, though. (like, if it's a boy or a girl. Get your mind out of the gutter.) Surprises are fun, sometimes. Any name ideas?

At the veeeeeery bottom of this page is the high school countdown! (I chose the least painful background, sorry.)

It's been.... 46 days, so far!

Friday, October 17, 2008

I Have just died laughing

DONT READ IT. Wait for the man to read it to you. Make sure your volume is up!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Here we go!!!
I wish two things.

1. COMMENT ON THINGS OTHER THAN THE MOST RECENT POST.
2. Things could be like they were March 4th.

YAY!!!!!

My fourth EVER attempt at drawing something in the manga/anime style has been proclaimed pretty good!!!! I'm so happy!!!! It took me seven years to cultivate my cartoon style drawing, and now, after two days, I'm already competent (if not great) at anime!

Maddie taught me well, hahaha!!

Well I'm sick.

Again. Fuck. LOL, I kinda miss my long, drawn out posts, so from now on I'll TRY to make longer posts. I wish I could go see Panic! tonight, but my stupid cousins won't take me. I'm seriously pissed off at Ms Mona, she made my TAG (Talented And Gifted) program with Mr Dietzel, and now she's not using it. How to find the simple subject and simple predicate- yea, right. Like I can;t do that.

Sunday, October 12, 2008

Not Much To Report

So yea. Rawr. Prob gonna breakup w. Anya tomorrow... meh, I just don't like her. But u know, once you've fucked someone... well anyways. Yea. Meh.



Tuesday, October 7, 2008

Here

I made a fictionpress account!

Monday, October 6, 2008

I Have Found My Sport!

Finally, one I'll play that's fun and just random enough!!!

See it HERE!

Saturday, October 4, 2008

Songs you WILL listen to

I Kissed A Girl
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tAp9BKosZXs
GO EXPIRIMENTATION!!!

Hot N' Cold
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NFhCsDdU
perfect "I hate emo" song

Ur So Gay
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tWbLkXhGEmo
perfect "I hate emo guys" song

Smile
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3M7WKNwww3M
Violence aginst exes? Commited by a girl kicked out of 7 schools? Perfect.

Thursday, October 2, 2008

Flamingo Legs of Yellow and Green

Bored bored bored in my mom's class... I dididn't go to school 2day. Beacause Andy made something that sounded like a suicide attempt on her blog. Understandably, I FREAKED OUT, and it took me an hour and a half before I was even willing to talk about it. So, mom took me to work with her so I didn't have to deal with school and all that shit. Yes, counselors were called, so they have a legal obligation to pull Andy and call her mom.
Gawd, why does life have to be so damn complicated? I mean, why can't everyone just mind their own shit and let us all get along? Ellie's left our group, Andy's dying, Mouse is acting like I'm the villian from some stupid HBO Lifetime movie. So.. with the whole "my-life-is-a-steryotypical-teenage-coming-of-age-book" theory, let's see where I am in the plot:

1. Start something new and big. CHECK
2. Make insta-friends with someone who otherwise wouldn't associate with you. CHECK.
3. Have crisis. CHECK.
4. Be rejected by crush. CHECK
5. BFF suports you. CHECK
6. Hook up with BFF. CHECK
7. Make huge discovery about self. CHECK
8. Get dumped, relize they weren't the right person for you. CHECK
9. Go into a "slut" phase whilst still obsessing over ex. CHECK
10. Do something crazy to try to "fix" self.
11. Find "true" happyness, figure out problems.
12. Go to high school.

Hmmm... 8 months and three major plot points left to go. Hurry up, author!!!!!

Seriously, I know you're sitting at your computer right now, going "How can I make Tizri AND Andy happy? My two protagonsits need some help!" You're calling your mom, your friends, asking for advice. It will come flodding in.

"Kill one of them!"
"Put them back together in time for the end of the year party!"
"Put Tizri with Benji! There's a plot twist!"
"Make a secondary character save the day!"

Well, author, I'm begging you here:
DON'T KILL ANY OF US OFF.

And hurry the fuck up! Make a montage or some such! A blank page that says "Six months later" like you did in Book 2, 7th Grade!


SERIOUSLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sunday, September 28, 2008

Saturday, September 27, 2008

More Snoggadge

:) :) :)!!!!!

:)


Shirtless, no less!!! ;)




So.... uhm.... shouldn't I feel like high and happy and trippy and shit? Not...just....
uhm.....

uhm....

mellow? Like, Oh shit, why did I spend the night up, now I'm tired and shit, and shit, what a waste of a night.


This is NOT good. I can't, you know, get to base 3 then be.....



unenthusicastic? Unestatic?

Fuck. SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (Go till the page is full, Blogger.)


HELP!??!?!?!?!?!!??!?!? WHAT HAVE I DONE/DO!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!!?


what...fuck....shit shit shit shit shit......

plus, uhm, tounge bath much? seriosuly needs to work on kissing skills, she does.

Thursday, September 25, 2008

K Well here we go again

*sigh* Anya just admitted she likes me, too. It was HILARIOUS.


I whispered my crush 2 Benji, she whispered to Samantha, they told eachother, then started laughing. I was like "i was right, huh?"

Part of me is like WHEEEEEE

the other part was like "well, another friendship down the drain. Fuck."

WHAT DO I DO!????!???!??!

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Damn it all

Andy, we need to set up a day 2 talk w. Alison. Yes, Ms. Black says we have to.
I satyed after school and HOUr AND A HALF today and was 10 mins late getting out the door to my mom cuz I needed to finish some proplems.
She screamed at me for being late. screamed. No "thanks for staying so late" or even " I'm gald you did your math". Nothing.

Sunday, September 21, 2008

*ROTFLMFSTC*

Watch it now!!!

Brisngr

Came out today. Meh. Wake me when something exciting happens.

Friday, September 19, 2008

Hey!!! READ THIS BLOG!!!!!

This one. Right now. Yup.

And don't for get to comment on the blogness!!!

Oh, right.... I (think) I have ppl FLIRTING with me? Have I, over the summer, suddenly become more attractive? 'Cause now it seems I'm "on the market"!

Thursday, September 18, 2008

*Speachless*

Read it. Spread it.

BE VIRAL! BE QUICK!

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Rargh

I'm under house arrest for the foreseeable future. I have to stay after school for an HOUR every day till I have A's in everything.

Monday, September 15, 2008

Hey, Look, Patterson SUCKS!!!

he blogs about how we shouldn't graft ears onto mice. Yes, we did that. Beacause it's awesome.




DONT RUIN MY FUTURE CAREER!!! GENETIC MODIFICATION IS HOW YOU WILL SURVIVE!

FUCK PF CHANGS

AND  FUCK EVERYTHING ELSE ALONG WITH IT!

Sunday, September 14, 2008

Cycler

If you have any respect for humanity left you WILL do that following steps, in order.

1. Beg a 20$ off your folks
2. Get your ass to the closest book store.
3. Find a book called cycler- it should have a girl in a pink bra and blue-and-white boxers on the front.
4. Read the first four pages- NO MORE. (this is the hardest step)
5. Buy book.
6. DONT TELL ME THE ENDING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Saturday, September 13, 2008

Hey, Look, My Opinion IS Supported By Sexperts!!!!

Andrea Nemerson (see the middle of the page) AGREES WITH ME!!!!!!

Friday, September 12, 2008

Huh....?

I thought Andy didn't like Mouse. Now they're dating.
HUH?
Ah, well, whatev.

My crush is gay!!!! woot!!!!!!!!

Note to Ellie: It's only a lil' one, don't get your panties in a twist.

Tuesday, September 9, 2008

Mouse. Andy. Read. Now.

Mouse: Fine! Date her already! I'm a big girl, I can handle it, I promise. Plus, from what I've seen, she likes you waaaaaaay more than she ever liked me. Which is saying something.

Andy: Stop rubbing salt in the wound. Stop doing whatever the hell you're doing that makes my brain stop working in math, it's seriously hard to pay attention. Date Mouse, if you want to. Congrats on going to the mall and not dying. Glad someone may cure you.


Have good sex!
-Kaylee Fry, Firefly, Shindig

Monday, September 8, 2008

Well, hrm dee dee.

There's SO MUCH I want to say here, (mostly rants and bashing) but apprently my fucking friends are no longer interested in any fucking thing I want to fucking do! 

So, FUCK PERCY JACKSON AND THE SHITTY MOTHERFUCKING OLYMPIADS.

AND ASS RAPE THE BITCHES WHO MADE IT POPULAR.

AND KILL BY PAPERCLIP THEN SHIT ON WHOEVER INVENTED ANIME.

Whew. Now it's off my chest.

Saturday, September 6, 2008

Wednesday, September 3, 2008

More Qoutes of AWESOME!

Benji: "Are you ready... to use your TOUNGE?"

Me: "Oh, its not at all sexual that we're using our tounges to see-saw."
Benji: "And that there's no girls allowed."
Me: Or that we're cramming large, clyndrical peices of wood down our throats.
Benji: "Nope. Nothing wrong with that, Eliana."
Me: "I'm not Ellie."
Benji: "But she's in my havara group!!!"
Me: "WTF?"

Emma: Benji is sooooooooo hot! I want to lick him all over!
Me: Yea, he IS cute.
Emma: ZOMG U SHOULD ASK HIM OUT!!!
Me: *facepalm*

(after the airport security told me to go the right way on the moving sidewalk)
Tyler: (Hissed whisper) Actually, lots of people do it everyday. It's called a treadmill. It's widely considered to be healthy.

Saturday, August 30, 2008

Ghoul

I woke up this morning with a nosebleed. Nothing special, until the blood dripped down the back of my throat. 
Dammit.
My whole body is burning, recoiling from regular food, my throat burns.
I have learned a word for what I am: Ghoul. a mortal who is STILL mortal, but requires blood... unless they can go long enough without it to resist. 

You do not know what this is like, unless you happen to be an ex alcoholic. the Twilight comparison is true.

Anyone with open wounds: ClOSE THEM BEFORE TUESDAY. Please?

Monday, August 25, 2008

oH MY GOD

max Ride release: 2010.
Twi. release: nov. 17th
THE OH MY HOLY FUCK FACTOR:


WHAT THE HELL, MAN? 

the next book will be called Water Wings: A Maximum Ride novel.
I Describe it as this:
OH NO! Fish are dying, because Big Oil is killing our ecosystem! The Flock must go underwater to save the fish, after being enlisted by the goverment! They go willingly with the Institute's Mr. Chu in a SUBMARINE, to STUDY THE WILD FISH and SAVE THE ECOSYSTEM.

Underwater.


the flock.


willingly working with the institute.


UNDER-FUCKING-WATER. IN A SUBAMRINE.


MAX, I THOUGHT YOU HATED SMALL SPACES WITH OTHER PEOPLE?!?!?!?!? AND SHOULDNT THE GOVERMENT BE ENLISTING SOMEONE QUALIFIED TO DO THIS, NOT JUST RANDOM BIRDKIDS WHO ARE USELESS.... UNDERWATER!!!! Well, except Angel, but she's SIX.


AUUUUUGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

Oh, btw, I found our Angel! (She needs a bit of hair dye, but the eyes!)

Being High Is Rather Fun... Then...

Okay, here's a rundown of what, exactly, it is like when you inhale waaaaaaay too many class 2 narcotics.

1. Your whole body tingles, and it feels calming, like sleeping pills. Not too bad, just pleasant. You amuse yourself by trying not to smile, because you think if you smile they'll take the drugs away.
2. Time becomes fuzzy, you no longer remember what happened or what will happen.
3. Now the room spins. This dosen't make you nauseous, it's just fun. 
4. And you can't feel your body anymore.
5. Now you're floating, going wherever you want. You're invincible. You're euphoric. Life is good and perfect.
6. Then you sluggishly are yanked part of the way back, enough to relize you feel really sick. Like, really really really sick.
7. Proceed to puke all over your dentist, the walls, your iPod, the floor, the TV, the eqiupment, and your hair.
8. Freak out the dentist, as she relizes she had very little oxygen ad mostly drugs flowing into your lungs.

Sunday, August 24, 2008

Operator Please- Get What you Want

I Can't get the video on the blog, so you'll have to click here

I wish I could, give you some ritalin, so mabye I could get a reaction, or mabye even a facial expression, but it's not your fault if you really dont wanna!

Friday, August 22, 2008

TEST!!!

TEST TEST TEST

TEST!!!!

TEST TEST TEST

Tuesday, August 19, 2008

Spreadshirt!


And the back....

Dont forget to tell me what you think of the post below! Comment on the paragraph/story chunk!

School, again

yaergh. Nothing much interesting. However, I wanted to post a little paragraph that popped into my head today, for no reason whatsoever. Note: it's NOT what you think it is. I swear.

I smiled at myself as I zipped up my gown. Baby pink and strapless, it would look better on the red carpet than in my home, but I had never quite given up my passion for the old. Besides, today was a day of celebration, so I guess gowns aren't out of the question. A jealous hum echoed through through the halls as the others saw me. Glorious, indeed. I clicked through the rooms, stopping briefly in the kitchen for an espresso. As I said- a passion for the old. I popped a few breath mints, though, for afters. I flung open the double doors, and stepped out into the dazziling sun.
"My friends," I sang, "we are free!"

I have NO IDEA where that came from. It popped into my head randomly. Any ideas? At all? I mean- I've never heard this character in my imagination before.

!!! Weird...

Sunday, August 17, 2008

Sophie!

Thanks! I'm glad I kick ass!

How did u find me?!

Friday, August 15, 2008


I got a mount!!! its a giant, ugly gray elephant!!!

THANK YOU ETHAN!!!! <3 <3 <3

Tuesday, August 12, 2008

Hello Faithful Readers!!!!!!!!

If you read this blog, comment! I wanna know who's reading.... ;)

Monday, August 11, 2008

Absolutely Terrifying

Deep in the rain forest, there is a frog that screams DON'T FUCK WITH ME. How does it do this, you ask? By giving you a dose of poison that has the same affect of vampire venom. Or, if you don't read Twilight, like someone lit every cell in your body on fire and then covered it in paper cuts. This horrifying creature is G-d Herself letting you know how bad her PMS is.

Would you like to see a picture of the frog?

Really?

Well, then, here you are.

Absolutely. Fucking. Terrifying.

Best waste of tiem ever is HERE!!!!!

Thursday, August 7, 2008

IaP

Almost...done!!!

I got a site, now I just need to get a custom domain and finishup...

Games!!!


After an hour and a half of mix-n-match, I got these outfits: (see wherever I managed to post a pic)
The link to the game is HERE!!!!!!

Wednesday, August 6, 2008

New. Stuff.

LOL, I got

1. Shirtsssss!!!! One that looks like this photo of Kari from MythBusters
2. Guy shorts!!!!
3. Pants!!!!
4. A miniskirt!!!
5. Leggings!!!!

Also, I have a performance open to the public on Saturday, 1200 am- 200 pm, at Old Main at CU. Come if you want, don't come if you don't. If I may say so myself, this year in Shakspeare Camp has been the WORST for acting.... X( our director is absolute SHIT... he has NOTHING organized.... Depression!!!!!!!!


Watch this video. You have NO CHOICE. it made me pee myself laughing!!!!!

Saturday, August 2, 2008

Let's Follow the Cops Back Home, and Rob Their Houses.

I have Placebo's Follow The Cops Back Home stuck in my head.

So, Twilight midnight release party- fanntabulous!!! A jacob/edward debate, Sarah and Bepe showed up, the whole twelve yards! The book- well....she's trying to please every fan at once, and therefore pleasing no one. I'm osrry to be such a spoil sport- I JUST DONT LIKE IT. It dosen't...feel right. It feels like a diffrent author, a diffrent series, almost. I have no idea if this is what she was aiming for or not, but meh. I digress. Besides Andy leaving, and Bepe showing up rather randomly, I say it was a fairly great party!!! What say you?

:0 g2g finish....

Thursday, July 31, 2008

About my massive email

OOPSSS!!!! I found a rly fun (but stupid) game on addictinggames.com, ment to link it...and forgot..... comment if you still want the link!!!!!!


Ooopppppsssssss........ sorry, sorry, sorrysorrysprrysppr0otiufgdjkf!!!

Whiffleball

So today we put Caleb (YES, the one from MANHATTAN) in makeup...!!!! Bright pink lipstick, blue mascara, purple eyeshadow, and blush. We paid him 8$, plus 2$ for tomoorow's hot pink tennis shirt.

The following quote happened while NONE of the class was focusing, trying to play an improv game with a whiffleball.

Tizri: Densest..whiffleball....ever.

Nathan: Densest...class...ever.

Tuesday, July 29, 2008

My boredum

Sick....*blergh*

Well anyways, seeing as though I haven't puked YET, I decided to rip off cracked's Children's Characters Who Need To Come Out of The Closet.

And dammit I'm bored.

And so, I present: Tizri's list of characters YOU said were (are?) gay. And wether or not you're totally batshit insane.

Scorpio (Farscape): Okay, let's take a looksee here. 1) Wears leather. Enough said. 2) Even BEFORE John had those wormhole memories implanted in him, who did Scorpio chase? Aeryn? Chiana? No. John. And *hem hem* he COULD have killed him at many, MANY intervals, but somehow continues to Epically Fail. 3) Uhm, makeup much?

Consensus: YES, because even though he screwed several evil chicks during the course of the series, he was always talking about John before, during, and after.

Chiana (Farscape): What the hell? It's practically a requirement of her androgyneous (sp?) species to be bi. Why did you even have to ask? She'll sleep with anything that moves, and some things that don't.

Consensus: Bi. No duh.

Danny Tanner & Joey Gladstone (Full House): Okay...evidence times!!!! 1) Neither rly dated chicks....ever..... 2) Even though Danny's WIFE FREAKING DIED, he refused to be sad, besides melodramatic tears. 3) Both are waaaaaaaaaaaay too excited to be made up by Danny's daughters. 4) Guy BFFs& a serious, commited BFF relationship (the kind that's usually reserved for kindergarten, ie "NO HES MINE!!! NO, MINE!!!!" 5) All too eager to move in there, Joey. 6) Neither one even LOOKS at Jesse's thousands of hot girlfriends. 6) oh, my god, how much fucking time do you need to spend on your hair there, Danny?!

Consensus: Totally in love w/ each other. Or really bad acting. You decide.

Chuckie (Rugrats): You scream and point to the fact that in All Grown Up he's nervous, timid and reluctant around girls. Aren't, uhm, lets think here, ALL SIXTH GRADERS?!?!?!?!?!?!

Consensus: The oldest we ever see him is 6th-7th grade. My minimum judgement age is 14, especially for fictional characters.

Angel (Maximum Ride series): Okay, Yahoo Awnsers, really?!?!??!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!! She's. Six. Years. Old.

Consensus: SIX. YEARS. OLD.

Lestat (Interview with the Vampire): True, he does lick/kiss/stroke his male victims, but he does that with any human he feeds on. It's like a whole taunting process for him. And yes, TWICE he choses males to become his companions in eternaty, but wouldn't you want a friend? Oh, fine. It IS a little fishy.

Consensus: Bisexual, or just seriously messed up.

(insert anime character here): Don't read it, don't watch it. It inspires rage in me.

Fang (Maximum Ride series): People assume because they assume he's emo he's also gay. That kind of backward logic makes no sense to me, plus, uhm, didn't he like grab and snog max in chap. 18 of book 3? And in the Lakehouse they have sex (or so I've been told)

Consensus: Assuming makes an ass out of u and me. I want proof in movie/book form. And no, Figgy fanfic does NOT COUNT, Flocker12.

And as for the dozens of other's the chats/forums/awnsers/muchobene told me: I only included the obviously bad ones in here cuz I thought it was hilarious to even think about. Some of them aren't even worth wikipedia's time. (Read: Edward Cullen. WTF?) :) Cheers all!!!


BREAKING DAWN COMES OUT IN JUST A FEW DAYS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHGHJGFDSHJKLREAGKI743Wjkeufi54t548iu6jk43tjkldsjkfgbhjretg;QjkafgjkLKDKAjQk opk;aHJKGHRSFJK;L/SAgdklgfjvgtreuifoi3eprdf gtjuy4i5h0peasfdojklwqn3r48y3oiknerui3243940kl;./;a/;a'auie4ufbdcmslrmvm cjmowp;w.wudueujejmdudsoir;hewfkWI4!!!!!!!!!!1


DIAGRAM THAT, MR. WRIGHT!


pan,t pan,t.... la dee dah dum....


































And now for something completely diffrent:
I'm a kiss-up Lord in Cymbeline 4 Shakespeare camp! Go characters that are shallow and don't have names!!!
*banghead*
4 those of u reading this who i dont know in "real life", how did u find out about mah blog?!

Friday, July 25, 2008

Summer Qoutes, Part Deux

*NOTE: do to the fact my computer hates me, I can't respond to email or post. Trust me, I HAVE read anything you send.*

"Flying is easy! All you have to do is throw yourself at the ground, and miss."

"I....like....POPSICLES!"

"Hey, Shakespeare, are you gay?"

"Ex-girlfriend's dad's boyfriend knows him."
"Wait, WHAT!?"
*sigh, bored by now* "Ex-girlfriend's dad's boyfriend knows him..."
"That's disgusting!"
*whack*

"TO THE BAT-TANK!!!!!!!"

"I'd be like a human trying to get a chicken pregnant."
"Well....there was that one guy...with the goat..."

"Ah, the wonders of venom."

"I will rub my gay germs on you!!!"


"YOU CAN DANCE." *bug eyes!*



Tuesday, July 22, 2008

New blogness!

I started a new blog: alwaysoneforguilt.blogspot.com!!!!!!

Sorry, though. :( No one but me is allowed to see it, but if I ever slaken in posting on fourletter, you'll know why. Basically, this blog is where all my private, emo-esque thoughts go, so I don't have to dump all my problems here. That was the original idea of this blog- to dump all my issues and depressing thoughts, but b4 you know it, everyone's reading it and it's huge and crazy. So I'm going to keep this blog, but for more public, happy things and the occasional rant. :)

Don't worry- I'll keep posting!!!!

Sunday, July 20, 2008

No Title

Someone, please, restrain me. Call me!!!! PLEASE!!!!!!! (mom phone)

Laptop!

Mom bought herself a brand-new Mac and an iPod TOUCH.

The good news is, as a peace offering, I get her old laptop!!!!!

Saturday, July 19, 2008

Epic Failure of the day!!!!!!!!!

Okay, so Elena was trying to ask me what I wanted to eat. The conversation goes as follows:

Elena: If you could have anything in the world RIGHT NOW, it's going into your mouth, what would it be?

(Pause)

Me: Oh! It has to be food related!

Elena & Josh: *Looks of horror*

And now the explanation so you don't think I'm perverted! Here's that conversation again, but from my eyes:

Elena: If you could have anything in the world RIGHT NOW-

Me: *Wings!!! Oh, wings!!!!!!!*

Elena: What would it be?

Me: *Oh, wait* Oh! It has to be food related!

Thursday, July 17, 2008

Best. Meal. Ever.

The scene: 30 minets late for dinner after swimming and chips
The cast: Tizri, Paul, Uncles Pete, Manuel, Fransisco Aunts Louisa, Teresa, Patricia (Pregnant) Cousins Ellie, Olivia, Rafaiel, Abel, Carlos (unborn), Abuelo (Grandfather).
The Location: The lake house.

Minet 0: food arrives! People rejoice, chips are hurriedly stashed away, books are whipped off the table into the living room.

Minet 5: We grow suspicious, as there is much more food than we had anticipated. Five bags with 4 meals apice, two bags of beans and rice and salsa and gaucamole cups (yes, cups), seven bags of chips. And 14 burritos in tin foil.

Minet 10: The children scramble and the adults throw open the containers, reveling 4 orders of chicken quessadillas, sevral HUGE burriots, some more quesadillas, and, inexbilcably, a chimichanga.

Minet 15: People panick. NOTHING IS WHAT WE ORDERED!!! (okay, well some of it is but not much)

Minet 20: Aw, screw it, I'm hungry. Food is eaten liberally all over the house.

Minet 40: Meal finished. Beer served. Dogs happy.

Minet 50: We go back for more. :)

Seething....

Andy has finally sucummed. Though this illness has ravished her body for months, slowly tearing her away from everything and everyone, sending her through chasms of pain and times of great difficulty, she is in a better place now. A place to be free and happy and to live her life as it was ment to be, without Tizri's ignorant judging of people based soley on their interests, free from the bonds that surround the inmeasurably lucky, free. *start solem music here*

I have turned into Jacob, only my Bella has been seduced by a culture I cannot abide by, instead of a person. Personal, irrational grudges blind me from seeing what the back of my minds knows I should see: good people, good person, but I can't hear them, see them, feel their presence. Their smell grows too strong, too hot, not unlike something burning quietly on the stove, forgotten. It heats my nose and makes me take shallow breathes. Andy has fallen into a cult I cannot allow to survive- but I love her nontheless.

Fuck. It. All.

I....I don't know how to continue.

Wednesday, July 16, 2008

Posting, Posting, Will Someone PLEASE Give me something 2 do!!!!

THE FOLLOWING IS ALL ON STRICT CODE 9. Read with caution...

Very very very bored. and very very very nosebleed. (Summer Glau on terminator+geeky relatives!!!) Also, been watching South Park....Gays and jews all bashed in one episode! WOW!!

OHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!! The WOW reg. mount lvl went down to 30! And Training is now only 35g!

As you can tell I am bored and have run out of material. Note the links to much more interesting sites on your right.

*facepalm to epic degree*

OMG. Something's filimng down the effing street. Is is TWILIGHT!??!?!?!?!?! OR MR?!?!?!


Gotta go find out b4 I EXPLDOE

Monday, July 14, 2008

X( *banghead*

My vampire name is apparently Selene Cross.
Don't ask me, I was bored.

SQUEEEEEEEEE!!!

The Breaking Dawn qoute of the day is up and running!!!! *fangirl squeeeee!*

Sunday, July 13, 2008

Blergh

I'm in Michigan and on a shared computer, so I'm very sorry if your emails or anything dont get awnsered too often. :P


HAPPY SECOND BIRTHDAY MOO PIE!!!!!!!!

Wednesday, July 9, 2008

Tizri the Tiger, Part 2

I got my nails painted offensive bright orange w/ TIGER STRIPES!!!!!! :) :)
If some1 wants to chill we. me, I'm avadabile 2morrow, friday, and saturday (I can talk my mom out of a bar mitzvah, she REALLY wants me to see friends.) Call me! 720.934.4326 My cell phone dosent work anymore :(
Mouse, mom dosent want me around u till Camp S, so I'm rly sorry!! :'( :'( :'((!!!!!!!!

bored....

Sunday, July 6, 2008

Dying, dying... dead.

DEAR GOD SOMEONE KILL ME. I'm sick and TIRED of being on the godamned road!!!!!!!!! I almost died, gained 15 lbs, look fat AND pimply AND I have a blind date coming up soon ( A chick named Kaylee who Bepe says is some1 I would def. like... I dunno, I like everyone till they prove to be an ass to me, so that's a wiiiiiiiiide definition. And no, I mean like. Not like like.) so I need to look good....*sigh*.
YAAARGH I'm bored.

Ohhh guess what! Patterson relized his fans hate him! Maximum Ride is now 2 series instead of one! The first (1-3) is called The Fugitives. The second (4-onward) is called The Protecters.

Now its easy and fun to hate!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

See how insane I;ve gotten?


Oh by the way my cousin in amazing to us and nice and polite, but worse than my fucking dad to his girlfriend. That. Fucking. Sucks.

Now somebody give me something to do (in a car) b4 I DIE!!!!

Saturday, July 5, 2008

I Feel Geeky!!

I understand this article. I get it now!!! :) I love wiki.

Do you understand it, or am I just a med freak?

Friday, July 4, 2008

Yellow Brick TOAD

I tried to buy a yellow brick, I really did. because if I bought a yellow brick from Pride Kansas and gave it to Andy she would be so happy and she'd kiss me and I'd be happy.

Of course, this did not happen. The lady ran out of yellow bricks, after I spent over an hour trying to find the damn store, so naturally I broke down crying, and I've already gained 5 lbs off this trip so my mom took me to the TREX cafe and bought me a fossil shirt and let me get good food at the resturant portion of it and I nearly forgot all about the fucking yellow brick until someone mentioned Nebraska. I have no idea how those two relate. but They Do. dammit.

*sigh* I played some awesome board games!!!! One is where you are in a haunted house, and I turned out to be the traitor!!! (A nine yr old blondie with a teddy bear and low sanity...see why I picked her!??!) I got to control a shitload of ghosts and a madman and I killed everyone!

Dead. Dying. Gah...

there is no coment maximum..............okay, there is. It's 100,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000. Stick to it now, kids.

Wednesday, July 2, 2008

No, I Will NOT. No. NO. Auuuuughhhh!

Going. Fucking. Crazy. In. Fucking. Kansas.
Its rly hot and humid and I'm tired and shit......

Not only that, but remeber Ashley from improv camp? Yea, just midly IMGOINGTOGOINSANE crushing on her. Y'a know, just a little. *Drool...*

Blond, delicate features, tall (IDK why but I like that) wheres contacts, all sorts of stuff. Drool. Droool.

And she's crushing on Vince from the acting camp. Gave him her number and shit. I gave her mine, and she gave me hers. I tried, really tried, to be polite and nice and not freakish, but
A) I'm Tizri.
B) She dazzles me...NOT FAIR DAMMIT!!!
C) Did I mention I'm TIZRI!??!?!?!?!?


I hope she's okay with that and shit.... she seemed like it....
I'll be her friend. I will, I will. Andy knows the process well.. :p

Just hoping I don't...y'know.....tell her....or anything....

Cuz that, my darlings, my dears, would SUCK ASS.


Any advice from Bueller? Bueller?


SCREW WHOVILLE!!! (We were playing a game where 5 ppl had to act out the pet peeves of some famous person, in unison, and Ashley got The Cat in The Hat, so after complaining about her hat for a while, she screamed SCREW WHOVILLE just as the game ended, and the whole room was silent!!! I nearly died!!!)

Tuesday, July 1, 2008

Rant

Anyone who takes offense at this article, I apologize in adavance.

All the fucking emos are all fucking clones of each every overly dramatic overly "deep" memeber of their soroity-esque club of ppl who claim to be godamned FUCKING NONCONFORMIST WHEN IN REALITY THEY'RE ALL EXACTLY THE FUCKING SAME BEACAUSE NONE OF THEM WANT TO ADMIT THEY DON'T HAVE ENOUGH OF A BRAIN TO COME UP WITH THEIR OWN FUCKING STYLE!!!!!!!! SERIOUSLY, HOW FUCKING HARD IS IT TO PUT TOGETHER AN ORIGINAL OUTFIT?!??! OR HAIR COLOR, MABYE?!?!? OR MAKEUP COMBO!?!?!? OR EVEN A LITTLE PERSONALITY!?!?!?

Fuck. The. World. The three comandements for the emos. Seriously, you live life ONCE. Fucking ONCE. Even if they find things to stop aging and shit, sooner or later you'll get cancer or get hit by a train or smoke your lungs out or fry on drugs or drown or something! You will DIE! So why don't you enjoy life, for what precious little life we are given? Sure, shit happens, but please, not ALL THE TIME. Most just dont take the time to notice when something GOOD is happening, because they're too busy talking about how much life sucks! *cutcutcut*

DAMN IT ALL TO FUCKING....never mind. Wouldn;t wanna ruin someone else's "creativity". Even the writing syle conforms. No more original characters/plots/anything. Its a little tiny tiny tiny box you put yourself in, to try to escape the bigger box we all live in.

They'res a girl in my class named Ashley and she looks soooooo much like Andy I thought it WAS her till I saw the blond hair and the dress. (fossil, BTW) She even has the same manerisms, the exact same way of saying things, the same way of folding into herslef, of looking up through her lashes when she notices I was staring at her, mouth hanging open, rather useless. And she's adopted. So she dosen't know her birth family.

But back to the point....did I have a point? Oh yes. It's like a 6th grade Andy..only my age.
creepy.

Going on a road trip 2morrow. Wont be back till Monday, late.

Don;t expect much of anything.

Monday, June 30, 2008

PEICE OF CRAAAP!!!

My comp dosnt work...:( At all.

Sunday, June 29, 2008

Lets Get Visual

For those of you who need reference to exactly how epically I failed, this site should give you the idea. Click the linky-link, swallow any and all liquids you happen to be drinking, and make sure you don't need to go pee (LEAH), because I nearly died laughing!!!

Epic. Fail.

My computer still isn't working, so sry if I'm slow on emails/blog.

I epic-failed at photoshop 2day. :P Got it (Finally!!! My comp's version SUCKED!!!) And...I failed. Argh, I screwed up some of my photos so bad I though I could nvr fix them. Thank god for "Undo!" I'm falling back unto my failsafe plan of tinker-with-it-randomly-till-the-fucking-thing-works.

Starting a new improv camp 2morrow.

I am delicious. Very delicious.

Saturday, June 28, 2008

Ick..

Now I;'m dizzy and sick. This sucks. Its like my head hurts and my arms hurt and i'm dizzy and blergh. Note to self: no more blood.

I got 2 henna tattos! One says "I reject your reality and substitute my own..." and the other one says 'quack, damn you!" with a duck under it :P

Friday, June 27, 2008

Blood Is Best

Oh, dear god.
So, I was at the street fair today, having a generally good time, hanging out with Bepe and her friends (lots of family, and Bepe's gonna hook me up with her incredibly hot ex!!!!!!!!)

But that was not the best part. i was drinking a Diet Coke when bepe said that most of her friends could smell people- JUST LIKE I DO. not only that, but we smell the same smells, and the points where it's strongest (wrists, neck) are the same. Then, she told me it's their BLOOD. yes, you heard me right. BLOOD. So one of the friends poured me some of hers.

And I drank it.

Oh. My. Good. God.

For those of you in the back there, going EEEEWWWWW, listen. It was the BEST thing I had EVER tasted. It's like each person's smell...only better, sweeter. I know this sounds like shit, but I swear it's true. Blood tastes amazing. If you can smell it, I mean.

Now I want more... tell Gita not to have any open wounds around me. Or most people, for that matter. I'm not too picky (yet).

I'm sorry if I freaked/grossed any of you out.

But it's incredible. It's impossible to describe, the taste.

Thursday, June 26, 2008

I'm Jasper!

I took 3 Twilight quizzes, and I'm Jasper Hale!

Wednesday, June 25, 2008

Yaaargh..

My life is coming apart at the seems. I was an awful bitch to Andy, showing her my side I swore I would never show her, even when i felt like RIPPING HER HEAD OFF AND CLAWING APART... see??!?!?!? I'm like some sort of MONSTER. When I get out of control, I'm gone and they'res nothing in this universe that can stop me. Even if it means I get arrested.
I don't want to live like this. I don't want to be known as "that scary chick". I want to be a good, in control person. And I try. I really, honest to god, do try. But I always seem to fail.
Someone, please, help me.


*and now for something completely diffrent!!*

Here are the weirdest summer qoutes (so far)

"Oh, that's OK, I'll just put it in my bra."
"Goats!!! It NEEDS goats!!!"
"Clamping vagina, clamping vagina..."
"It's like turtles..in helmets..on crack..."
"Look!!! An ardvark!!"

Monday, June 23, 2008

My Head Just Exploded In Cuteness

The two blondes that drop in here were made by one of my teachers. Yes, this IS really what I'm spending the next week making.

http://youtube.com/watch?v=j7al5TKaR8M

Saturday, June 21, 2008

Apologizes

I can;t email/blog from MY comp, and I'm about to go to a 9-6 summer camp, so don;t expect much in the next week...:(
:) if you need to contact me, call me!! I usually dont respond to texts...

Do Not Read Unless You Don't Mind Angst

Okay, this is how it is. I know I'm gay. I'm okay with that. But...it makes me think. Could this just bean offset of my quest to be diffrent? Seriously, because with the ammount of hate and shit lesbians get, it's not a fun thing. I mean, I try sooooo damn hard to be nonconformist, and very few people are a 5 out of 6 on the Kinsley scale that it would make me diffrent. But still and yet, the idea of even holding hands with a guy freaks me out mucho. Is this who I am as a person? Or is this a side effect of my rewiring brain? I didn't really "get it"till puberty hit...don't most ppl know they're diffrent from when they're bitty? And I'm not butch at all. I know that's just a streyotype...but in truth I like geeky girls. ARE there any bookish geeky utterly insane Sapphists out there? Am I alone? And will this post humiliate me in ten years when I have a husband and kids and think "Oh I was such a screwed up child!" I doubt I WILL ever even date another guy..but with the new hormone therapy that's emerging, mabye the government will FORCE the GLBs to change. Scary shit.

My computer hates me at the moment, so email is minimal. sooooo sorry for not responding sooner!!! :( :( :(

IaP is getting more complex...choose if you want Trace, Mild, Moderate or Severe mutation! The bigger degree of mutation, the bigger the advantage...and the price!!!

Thursday, June 19, 2008

*Drool*

Uhm, Nudge (in Manga at least) has boobs. Actually, honest to goodness, BOOBS. SHES LIKE ELEVEN! Not. Oh. Khay.
Plus, Max is...erm....*drool*

Angel's wings are much 2 tiny, but she looks aporpirately creepy as all shit. Fang and Iggy look exactly like every other manga boy in the universe- skinny with weird hair. Gazzy, however, I LOVEEE!!!

And why in the nine hells are they keeping Akira? (GET OVER IT TOTAL)

Yes, I know this is direct violationof my current no-MR thing.

I'm already feeling the effects (affects?) don;t worry. Big time. 30 mins of MR exposure is not resulting in fun...ness. And IZ have nothing to distract me. This is gonna suck.

....


...

Yep. there it goes. Byes!

Wednesday, June 18, 2008

Moo Pahi!!!!!!!

Moo pie and Elena are gone.....*WAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!* :'(
Not that I'm sad or anything....:'( ::::::(
Lots of wet kisses all around...

turns out eleny's dating girls 2, which made me smeil so big my jaw cracked. OW.

I'm sparkly!!! I smell good!!!

Edward+Bella+Fang+Max=Lots of fun, I replied to ur comment!!!

Monday, June 16, 2008

Maximum Ride

Can some1 help me plz?

I cant READ, think about, or watch anything having to do with Max. I watched a 40 sec. Itex clip and BAM!!!! It felt like some1 had carved a huge hole on my belly button and stuffed me full with some really pissed off ants. I can't go to the movie. I had to curl up in a ball and whimper for 3.5 hours after the ITEX clip, what would 90 mins do?!?!?!


what do i do?!

Sunday, June 15, 2008

but Who To Betray?

Cro and Elena...are...I cant even say it....Edward+bella.

Should I tell my mother, because I'm her daughter and therfore I owe her much biggie? Or should I stay quiet and let my favorite (and most dangerous) cousin get away with THIS.

I'm so angry I just broke sevral plates and some mugs. (sry andy blamed it on u didnt wanna own up)

HELP!!!!!!!
WHAT THE FUCKY FUCK FUCK FUCK DO I DO!?!? ELLIE?!?! LEAH?!?!? ANDY?!?!?

...

Conflict...in...mah.....head!!!!!
Finished the char sheets and the Rules and regulations.


I told my dad I'm a "Grade-A Saphist!" I wonder how long itll take him to figure it out...

LOL, still accepting ideas 4 IaP, even though I'm ALMOST done.

My 100th Post!!!

This is my 100th post!!!!!!!

Sorry if I dont post as much or respond to emails as much, I've got a 1 yr old at my house and my computer's messed up, so I have to borrow my moms which is being fought over by 6 people.

I'm working on the Rules and Regulations for IaP, they're long and legal...*sigh*. Start planning ur chars!

Friday, June 13, 2008

Ink And Parchment

I have decided to call my site InkAndParchment.com. If I can. Comment ideas on what the freaking hell the premise for this epic fantasy writing game thing. Post apocolypitic sounds cool, but its very, VERY cliched, so I doubt that I should do that. and I want it to be on Earth, cuz I dont feel like inventing a whole freaking new map...to start. ;)
LOL, i want 2 get this on-line ASAP, idealy when I start my job in the fall. Yes, I am working. yes, I will be making cash. Yes, most of it will go into hosting. No, nobody forced me to do this.
Comment like the wind! give me ideas! Otherwise the site WILL be shitty!!! Seven hands are better than three!
Hundreds of members are better than ten.....tell everyone u freaking know once its actually up and running.

Tuesday, June 10, 2008

Rejection!!!

I got turned down by Escaping Reality, a shitty good for nothing peice of crap online role playing game. Why is it awful? Because its a FANTASY game...with no FANTASY. EVERYONE is a "normal"(?!) human. With no powers. I tried to make this rly cool energy-vampire type FANTASY character, told she wasnt "realistic" enough.
HELLO!?!? Dont advertise as a fucking fanatsy game if you dont want fantasy fans making fantasy characters!! Thats almost like making a maximum ride game...where no one has wings!

I'm. Making. My. Own. Godammed. Website.

Dammit.

This could get interesting...

EMAIL ME DAMMIT ANDY

Friday, June 6, 2008

Peirced!!! Stabbed!!!

EEE!!!! Diamond nose stud in my nose, in my nose, diamond nose stud in my nose, all the live-long day!!!

I. Look. A-mazh-ing!

Thursday, June 5, 2008

Stupidest. Idea. Ever.

National Makeout day, I kid you not, is May 5th.

This makes no since in this or any ther universe; I can understand a day for love and gushy feelings, I can understand a day to celebrate the day some dead dude started walking, I can understand a day for the too damn hot times and the too damn cold times.

National Makeout Day makes no sense. The act which it celebrates, though enormously entertaining and sexy and a million other adjetives I won't list here because my blog's already X-Rated, is not a "special" thing. First time? Definitely. First time with someone new? Yup.

But, c'mon, most people over the age of 15 and under the age of 40 make out almost every day. (Especially in the high school/college years, if alcohol consumption statistics are to be trusted.)

It does not need a holiday. That would be like making a holiday for Diet Pepsi.

Not Quite Normal

'm better now. Sufice to say, I thougt of so many romantic gushy things I could say in this post that I'm now slightly nauseus. I love you, Andy. I'll wait till your're ready. And I'm so, so, so sorry for acting like such a bitch.


You know, in every coming-out story I've read, they start with, "I always knew something just wasn't right." Mine would start with "I layed in bed, idly playing with my canopy, humming a Placebo song, when the thought just sort of marched through my head: 'you're a lesbian'. It wasn't until I got up, showered, and was in the middle of my waffels when I even thought about them again. And then quickly dismissed the tought, because I didnt give a damn."


I have come to the conclusion that I Am Tuna. And I do think Brian Molko is hot. Prove me wrong.

And this link thing is way to much fun for my sanity!! Weird....

Tuesday, June 3, 2008

'Fuck It' Mode

I am, officially, in Fuck It mode. God, I havent been in FI mode since the 5th grade. Basically I dont give a shit what I do anymore, what I say, or the hell I say it to. It's truly the "rabid flailing beast" in all of us. Or possibly just the absolutely plastered bitch in all of us.
Yep, I'm not providing deep thoughts or a rant or something in even vaugley funny in this post. I'm bitching and moaning and acting like pretty much every emo kid out there. I'm trying very, very hard not to smash something large and preferably alive, because the nearest avadabile thing is the 12-wk-old kitten I got yesterday. Even in FI mode, I'm not THAT cruel.
Okay, I am. Just not kittens. I bet I could take, like, 50 five yr olds in a fight right now. Fueled by Nutella. Fifty flailing five year olds fueled on Nutella.
Now I'm just scared, because I can totally imagine the little bastards kicking and screaming with chocolate covering their face, like some weird crack-Nutella addict.
Stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid. 'm talking to myself. Why? I don't know Tizri, ask yourself. Okay, why ARE you talking to yuorself? CAN IT GWEN! Better. Thank god for iPod controls!!!!!!!
I'm talking to myself because it gives me something to do other than focus on how incredibly self-pitying and emo I'm feeling. I sound like a whiny brat.
Oh, SHIT. 'Loose Lips" just came on.
hmmmhmmhmmmhhmmmhhmmmmhmhmhmhmmmmhmmm
I hope they come for me soon, the food's good in "survalence".
Tizri! Snap out of it! You're ranting like a mad crazy deranged person on a PUBLIC BLOG.


should I publish this? Yes, I should, because I need to remind myself exactly how insane I was.



I AM TUNA! I DONT KNOW WHAT PRIME TIME IS!

The hell!?!?

Where did the last 7 hours go!?!?!?

Monday, June 2, 2008

Well

This sucks. Officially.

You're so nice and you're so smart
you're such a good friend I hafta break your heart
I'll tell you that I love you then I'll tear your world apart
just pretend I didn't tear your would apart

I gues you can write that story now.

Quirky

I am officially numb. You could drive a fucking sword through my arm and I wouldnt notice. So I decided to take adavantage of this oppurtunity to be as insane as I can be. Hours of disposable time+A shocked, numb and so crushed Tizri that "sad" dosent even SCRATCH the surface=WHEEEEEE
NOTE: I do actually LIKE all these artists. It's whats on my iPod. I just thought I'd poke fun.

AFI: We're not gay...no really. Ignore the eyeliner. And the tight black leather clothes.
Antsy Pants: We're 12!!! We're in Juno!!! WHEEEEEEEEEEE!
Apocalyptica: We make Metallica bareable. By using cellos. Yes, cellos. Side effects may include a sudden tate for classical music.
Danger: We have one hit. And it's in french. Dammit.
Darude: We have one hit.
Gwen Stefani: Yes, I had a band. Yes, my voice is still scary as hell. Yes, I continue making music.
I Hate Kate: Judging by the fact almost all their songs are about breaking up and bad girlfriends, beside being my food and drink right now, I can't help but think one of them formerly dating the aformentioned Kate. And he hates her. And likes using first person.
Kimya Dawson: I'm not a major star, I'm Indie and wear really Boulder-esqe clothes AND have hair that is AL MOST as scary as the guy from Tokoyo Hotel. And my lyrics, though cute, make no sense.
Lemon Demon: Yes, we did Potter Puppet Pals. Imagine that...in musical form.
My Chemical Romance: WE HAVE ISSUES WITH CAPS LOCK!!!
Nightwish: My incredibly hot voice and incredibly hot bod make up for the fact that everyone else in this band is possibly possesed/high/undead. Or mabye all three.
Nirvana: If you can understand what we're saying, you're just as stoned as we are. Were.
No Doubt: Pop band that specelizes in whiny, breakup-style songs. And songs about how much we think Gwen is hot.
Operator Please: Teen band Down Under. If you thought music couldn;t get any stranger, you were wrong. Be very afraid.
Paramore: I somehow managed to form a pop band and retain a punk identity! And, inevitibly, we'll move from punk pop to just pop, becoming as "punk" as Avril Lavine and destroying millions of pre teen hearts everywhere. Enjoy the awesome while it lasts.
Placebo: I am hot. My voice sounds like a sheep. It is also hot. We are what emo kids salavate over- and the eyeliner, lipstick, eyeshadow, and nail polish dosen't mean I'm not male. Did I mention our new drummer sucks?
Savage Garden: Middle aged women everywhere, rejoice! Your prayers have been awnsered! A band "cool" enough to be OK with the kids, but adult enough to be bearable!
Andrew Pants: Lemon Demon for people with ADD. Or AD/HD. Or both. Or all three.
Suzanne Vega: Slow, message-heavy songs. Some make you want to cry and kiss the very ground she walks on. Some make you want to strangle the woman.
T.A.T.U: We can break the fucking sound barrier with our voices! Watch us hit higher notes than humans can hear! You dog will go INSANE!
Three Days Grace: REBEL!!! REBEL, DAMN YOU!!!!!
"Weird Al": Someone escaped the asylum...run for it!


This was not meant to be funny. This was meant to distract me. It did. For 20 minets. If it's not good, who cares?
Deal with it.



I may or may not go on a rant sooner or later...but now I gotta go update my OkCupid! Realtionship Status.

Let me leave you with words the will forever be a symbol of pain for me:

AH, FUCK IT.


And Andy? Deal wit it. I be mad. I can has slack? I need vent. Bad.
Other option: I can has punch. I can has break concrete walls.

Saturday, May 31, 2008

Andrea

I love you. I love you more than air, than food, than water.
But I think I might die if I don't know;
do you love me too?

Friday, May 30, 2008

Midnight

Its almost midnight.
I'm not even vaugely tired.

My mind is running in impossible circles, and the only two options I have aren't execptable. One; run away like the coward I am, throw away the one thing that matters to me most. Break up with Andrea. It took me twenty minets to type those four words, because even the mere thought of doing that stabs giant holes in my chest. Option Two; live through summer, knowing I'll see Andy in the fall. Not okay. I'm in enough pain as/is. The other options all make no sense or require bending of reality to come true.

I don't know whats happening to me. It's a bit early for PMS- as a matter of fact, freakishly early, so that's been discounted. Sleep. I have to sleep. My mind is still going in torturing cricles, slowly stripping away whatever limited concept of sanity I have left. I need a distraction, something I can throw myself into to occupy my body and mind.

I need to throw a party.

That's what I'll do. A sleepover- june 8-9. A twilight themed party. With Lucy. And lots of weird things. Go Alice on their asses. I will plan an epic party. I will endure till june 9th planning my party. Then Elena will arrive; my mind will clear. Or not. It might fog up more.

It's days like this I regret giving up cutting. Pain takes away every other emotion and lets your mind be clear, for once, to think. I need a clear head right now. How do I get one?

Belongings

What belongs to me?
Do my eyes?
My hair?
My skin?
My heart?
No.
They all belong to someone else.
I'd like them back now,
please.

That Girl

I'm just spewing words.

I'm too hot-
molten lava drips across my skin.
I'm too cold-
my heart feels ready to stop beating.
I'm too awake-
my stomach lurches, my limbs twitch.
I'm too asleep-
I haven't moved for hours.
I'm too quiet-
I don't say what matters most.
I'm too loud-
I say what you don't want to hear.
I think its too late for me,
that girl
the one who's glassy eyed and wanders
unseeing
but who always sees too much.

Thursday, May 29, 2008

SUMMER!!!!!

Well, its officialy been 2.5 hours of summer vacation, and I'm bored. WoW's busy, I can't play sims, I have no new books to read, and I'm

B

O

R

E

D

!

!

!

HELP!!!!!!!!!!!

Friday, May 23, 2008

Oh, To Poop in Peace!

I went to the doctor's 2 days ago. I will spare you the gruseome details.

Meh...*shudders*

Saturday, May 17, 2008

*Blerhg*

Blergh. I got WoW running. I'm tired...and have stomach flu...and I miss my Andy!!!!

Mom had a party with some of her college students last night, it was fun!!! I'll show u the vid I made soon, i interviewed them all to become president!

Tuesday, May 13, 2008

Birthday Madness!!!

Happy birthday dear Rob, happy birthday dear Rob, happy birthday dear fucking hot vampire boy, happy birthday dear rob!!!
Lets here a big happy b day for Robert!!!! W00t!!!

In other news...I'M GOING TO THE TWILIGHT MIDNIGHT RELEASE!!!!!! ITS MY BDAY PARTY!!!!! ALL MY FRIENDS ARE INVITED!!!!!!! Also, I'm attending the Breaking Dawn midnight release, which you are all also invited to partake in. Especially members of my coven. ;)

Attendence for both of these events is optional. However, only an idiot or someone who hates being with other people would pass this up.

Leave a comment!!!!!! Comments make me squeal with joy!!!

NOOOOOO!!!!

I HAVE NO WORLD OF WARCRAFT UNTIL CRO GETS BACK BECAUSE HE IS THE ONLY ONE WHO KNOWS HIS PASSWORD SO I CAN GET INTO HIS ACCOUNT AND DOWNLOAD THE PATCH!!!!!!
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ANYWAys, I'm home sick 2day. Yay! Great fun! *eye roll*

Monday, May 12, 2008

Creepy...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qRALvxgKIi0
Can any1 explain why my name is the oNLY tag 4 this? Thxs!

Tizri The Tiger!!!!!!!

lol, i can't tell if Andy likes my idea about the nose stud or not. Who cares? I did blood typing without screaming, freaking, pulling away, or even thinking about how much it would hurt. Awesome diamond stud- here I come!!!!

Okay, this issue has been bugging me for ages, so I decided to blog and blog and blog about it. Leah's writing a story, about how all of us have been genetically engineered and shit. I looove it- except- I dont have wings, when other people do! :(

I got over that, though. Even though every time I think about my inability to fly, I get this pain in my chest like someone decided to carve a giant hole right about where my liver should be.

How do I deal? I get A FUCKING TON of awesome powers!!! Like, more than Angel has!!!!! Happy!!!! Hrm...I'm like a tiger/human mix, so I have claws, a murderous rage, the ability to read minds, and more stuff that is to be decided.

Hey, Leah, if Ellie was kind enough to email you this post (WINK WINK NUDGE NUDGE ELLIE) I have three things I would loooooooove to have. One: The ability to run like a maniac, awesome strength (both very cat-like features) and the ability to change my eye/hair color. Note: these are suggestions, as in if it screws up your plot or whatever, completely and utterly ignore them, please. They would just be really freaking cool.

What else, what else? I'm the guinea pig of Benji's latest expiriment, but there's not much to tell on that yet because I have no idea whatsoever he is going to do.

I saw Chorus Line yesterday- YAY!!! Great play!!! Don't want to blog about it!!!!

LOL, I relized I am fucking strong. I mean, on Saturday I had a voice recital, and I was really nervous, so I dug my nails into the (concrete) wall and gripped hard, and then *crack* a CHUNK OF SOLID CONCRETE WALL was in my hand. I put it back in, and smoothed the wall around it with my thumbs so it would look kinda normal...ish. And today in LA I was pissed as hell, so I slammed my (free!!!!!) copy of Eclipse aginst the bookselves-twice. and It cracked into two- twice. Oops... can NORMAL people rip off chunks of wall and book like that?

I've had a fever for two months and counting now, so I'm just assuming I run at 99.8 ferenheight normally, because it makes me so damn overheated! Ugh, its so damn hot all the time...if the freak weather here would snow 2nite I would love that!!

I'm developing abs and upper arm muscle!!!! All that swinging is paying off!! I love myself!!!

Its weird..I used to be this total weakling, not even able to lift heavy (20 lbs+) stuff, and now I'm ripping chunks of wall off and growing muscles and hauling our 170 lbs lovesack with ease. Lets hear it for hormones, people! That lovesack weighs more than I do, jeez...

Wow this is a long post. Ellie has a boyfriend named Reece's Pieces. No, his name is Reece, but whenever I hear that I think about peanut buttery chocolatey goodness.

Arthur's taking me shopping soon. He wants me to wear things other than a t shirt and jeans. He wanted to take me to Hollister, but I violently refused. I may not be emo, but I sure as HELL will NEVER be prep. (Is prep short for something?)

Cyas!!

Thursday, May 8, 2008

Godamn Leprechauns, Godamn Leprechauns

Updates:

1. I;m soooo sorry I forgot ur bday, Mouse!!!!! Happy insanely belated birthday!!!!
2. Given up on the emo thing. I like life too much to hate it.
3. Blood typing in Science today. I promised myself if I can do this w/o freaking out, then I will get my nose pierced.

Sunday, May 4, 2008

Afraid

I'm scared. Normally I would go on a rant and sevral tangents, but I dont have much time here. I'm so so, so so, so so, so so, sorry to the person I hurt. U kno who u are


please, if u forgive me, leave it in the comments. or if u dont, leave it in the comments.

Saturday, May 3, 2008

Meh

Meh. I have nothing 2 report. so meh.

Thursday, April 24, 2008

I'm a bit paranoid

Andy's been netdead and isnt doing a bday thing. That's ok, its just the present i got her was kinda expensive... and she didnt respond to any of my i love u's anymore... and she seems kinda out of it...
i'm just being paranoid, i pray...
i hope....

Sunday, April 20, 2008

STARFEST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

WHEEEEEEE!!! Starfest! Starfest!!! I just got back!!!!!
:) :) :) :)
Okay, so quick run down of what happened.
I met a new friend! Her name is Robin and she's 16 and is homeschooled and loves yaoi and firefly and writing and star trek.
I got some GREAT advice from many a writing panel.
I bought a shitload of new stuff!!! My favorite is the button that says "Alchemy: It only costs you an arm and a leg!"
I got a beer bottle thrown at me!!!!
I hugged Adam Baldwin twice, asked him 2 questions, and got a photo!
Saw Michelle Nichelles!!!! (I KNOW thats not how u spell it)


The only damper on my day is the fact Andy hasnt emailed me in more than a week and now shes syaing on her blog that she can write whatever she wants. Did I do something wrong? If so, i'm so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so sorry!!!

I'm sure I'm just being paranoid...

Thursday, April 10, 2008

Thinking Back

Nostalgia is what I am feeling, I think. Today, I tried, really truly tried, not to think about Andrea in he hops the day would go faster. No dice. It was...excruciating, the moments I wasn't thinking about her. So, at all times, even if it's just in my subcounsicious, I am vaugley aware. I have decided to get it all out of my system in this werid, nostalgic post. So deal wit it!!!! Okay, lets think here....
First day I met Andrea. The breath was litterally knocked out of me when she walked into frist period science on Friday. She hadn't been at the orientation- trust me, I was memorizing faces FAST. The orientation was mostly full of prim and proper preps *Shudder*. Anyways, this girl was...diffrent. Her clothes were diffrent, but not weird, and she smelled...ohmigawd. It's like the Edward/Bella science class, seriously. I had wondered why no one else was turing to see this crying, shaking figure be escorted into the room by the principal. She sat directly behind me. I said "Hi! My name's Tizri." She whimpered. Ms. Smith gave us a moment to be crazy, for whatever reason- I think she went in the back room to get something. I scooted my chair to her table. "Are you okay? Can I help?" I asked leading, poliet questions. Things any concerned person would ask. And, at 5'7", she wasn't really hard to miss. More whimpering on her part, with some head-shaking. I thought she was "Special". Turns out she was, but not in any way I could have ever guessed. However, while I was making one-sided concered smalltalk, I had to remind myself, for the first time in my life, to keep breatheing. I knew...I knew, somehow, that THIS particular person, this girl, was not someone I would let go of this easily. Most people, I would ask if I could help, they said no, we part ways. I KNEW I could get to this girl, who's name I didn't even know, if I was persistant. So dear god, I was. I sat near her every day from there on in, until one day she finally agreed to have lunch with me, after some short, awkward sentences.
She came, clutching a teeny lunch bag to her chest, like that might protect her. We sat on the stone steps near the entrance- (this has now become a sort of gathering point for various misfits wanting to talk to various misfits.) and she was off. I mean, she didn;t shut up for 30 minets. She talked about ANnoher Wonderful Life, a video game I had never heard of. Her voice, once she was relaxed, was melodius and made me just sit there, chewing. So she does speak, is what I kept thinking.
After that, we mostly did lunch every day. And talked. Lots of talking, lots of laughing, lots of screaming as people opened the doors and knocked over our food. Those thirty minets, combined with the hour and a half long science period, made my life worth living, even in the mist of the worst period of my life, ever. This girl, she made me feel whole, like my whole life I was only half a person, wandering around for the other half, stumbling blindly in darkness till I could get there.
When she left school, I cried for days. RIGHT after she left, her friends and I (in the middle of an Opera presentation my Mr. Johnson) threw our heads back and screamed "NO!!!!!" for a whole minet.
We stayed in touch. Adam came and went, nothing more than a blur of rough descriptions and hours of phone minets to me, because the only thing that mattered was Hannah, and her smile.
And now, after school today, I wandered into Ms. Smith's classroom, and touched frist the spot I first saw her, then the spot I first talked to her, then the spot where she first talked to me, and all the spots we sat together, in order, remembering every detail. Remembering how we'd stop whole classes, how we stuck a touch up a Peep's ass, laughing maniaclly, how we had seen the ADD jump roper from Colorado, how we gosspied about Benji, read, lived.
I only touch those stone steps as little as allowed, because all those places I went with her are so charged with memory, it's hard not to just stand there and soak it all up.
Andrea is my savior, I doubt I would be alive without her. At least emotionally. I can't imagine what would have happened if she never came along, if she never broke down that day. I...I can't even imagine how I could have ever lived without her.


Now that I have gotten at least a little bit out of my system, mabye I can hold on till Saturday, at 945 AM. Hopefully.


Hey, Andy, if any of my memories are wrong, correct me, kk?

Tuesday, April 8, 2008

Post the PostIt

I found a rly good qoute by Edgar Allen Poe 2day. it was something like "I became insane with long insuferable periods of sanity". That pretty muchs sums it up dont u think?
I have nothing to do. I'm suffering panic attacks, so its insanely, tremedously hard for me to hold a train of thought at the moment. Its like Andy withdrawl. :'(
I shouldnt be posting now, in my current state, but oh. freaking. well. I want to. I gained back the weight I originally dropped, going back on my diet 2day. *shudder*. Not fun. Oh well, at least I'm still a 14, but I have like 20 lbs to go until i'm "healthy". I hate the government. I can't hold a train of thought. I also appear to be having some sort of memeory losss, because I cant remeber why I started to write this post in the first place. Should I get dressed? Oh no wait I just did...

I'm just writing now because the clicky-clack-clicky of the keyboard is better than the overwhelming silence of being utterly and completely alone.

Andy, andy, andy, andy, andy, andy I MISS YOU!!!! COME BACK SOON!! WE WILL DO SOMETHING THIS WEEKEND I HOPE!!!!!!!!!!

I need you...

Saturday, April 5, 2008

ICE CREAM!!!!!

I am sitting here, enjoying the first ice cream from the truck of the season!!!

YAY!!!!!!!

Friday, April 4, 2008

*sigh*

Fine, fine. constructive critisizm is fine. I just normally dont even show my poetry to my closest friends. Its made me...vunerable, showing something this private to the world. Sorry for going off the handle. I just need to get used to the fact people want to hear what I have to say.
:0 Just, try to be gentle, and dont outright flame me, kk?

Metaphorically speaking, of course

Mr. Wright made us write a right extended metaphor poem (sry about the liberal rhyming there)

I had to cobble something together, because the ACTUAL poem I had going through my head was not something I was about to share. I'll post it hear because I feel like it, goddamit. So if you don't like it: THIS IS MY GORRAM BLOG!!! I WILL POST WHAT EVER THE HELL I WANT TO!!! DONT CRITIZISE SOMETHING YOU WERNT EVEN REQUIRED TO READ!!!
DO NOT READ IF: You do not enjoy shitty poetry, romantic poetry, Andy, metaphors, people trying and failing to sound deep.


Andrea is good news
always changing
suprising
but never unwelcome

Andrea is hope
keeping you up for hours
tracing her name in your pillow
waiting

Andrea is warmth
helping you going through snow
feeling that if you could be in her arms
forever
things would work out

Andrea, to me, is perfect.

Wednesday, April 2, 2008

Just Some Words

It's well past my bedtime, but some words keep popping into my head: they may be shit, but I NEED to let them out.

The diffrence between
me and the next girl,
is that the next girl
is not me.

I want to fly because
at fifteen thousand feet,
people care more about freedom
and less about who you like to kiss.

I g2g- the parenst discovered me.

Benjamin Sisko

CONGRATS!! If you're reading this, you are not a loser!
THE REASON BENJAMIN SISKO IS NOT IN MY STAR TREK CAPTAIN'S QUIZ IS AS FOLLOWS:
I have not seen DS9 yet!! I'm still plowing through Voyager!!! As soon as I see enough DS9 to get the characters, I promise, I will add him!! Hang tight, folks!

Nancy Boy

It's a song...about Brian Molko....growing up bi. I LOVE IT!!!

Tuesday, April 1, 2008

I draw the line here

My mother keeps telling me Andy has too much "emotional control" over me. She says next year ANDY, of all people, will force me to leave my other friends to be with her. Uhmm.... WTF!? Andrea would never, EVER do that to me. I know this. For fact.
You've taken a lot from me, mom, I draw the line here.

Sunday, March 30, 2008

Popular, I'm gonna make you popular!

WOW!!! My OKCupid profile is much liked! So are my tests!!
If you are a fellow OkCupid user, welcome to my blog and my brainpan!

I feel so loved....:D

Wednesday, March 26, 2008

Richard Jr.

Yay!!! I met a new friend at Star Trek: The Expirience 2day! (He was scared shitless on the borg invasion ride... i led him thru the klingon ride and gave him the roughest seat in the house, teehee!)

He's officially my fourth emo-bi-cutter-animefreak friend (well, fourth that I've made, there are only three left now.)

And as an added bonus: he's cute as all get out! (No worries Andy, I told him I had GF)

So yea...i g2g, my madre dosent want me on too long.

Savage Garden

Sunday, March 23, 2008

OMG

I TOLD MY DAD I'M BI. HOLY SHIT. HE IS THE GUY I TRUST THE LEAST IN THE WORLD AND HE KNOOOOWS!!!!
fuck
fuck
fuck

If it wern't for Andrea (I love you! (this much!)) and Loose Lips by Kimya Dawson, I would be sobbing now.

I WAS WRONG~!!!

YAY!!!! ANDY DOSENT HATE ME!!!!! SHE WASNT TALKING ABOUT ME!!!!
HAPPY, HAPPY, DAY!!!

Saturday, March 22, 2008

Please, if you are merciful, shoot me now

I can't live anymore. I can't do it in this state. Andy hates me. I'm her main antagonist. Because I didn't like Maximum Ride four. I- I'm at a complete and utter loss for words, for the first time in my life, I am stunned into silence. I feel like puking. Puking and cutting. Cutting deep enough to see a little river of crimson blood seep through my brand-new chain pants- deep enough to somehow gouge out this feeling of utter emptiness, of sadness. I love Andrea. I love her so much there is very little I wouldn't do for her- nothing I wouldn't do for her. An hour dosen't go by where I don't think of her- and she hates me. I am her antagonist. Please, please, please, if you're a merciful, save-the-puppies kind of person, shoot me now. This pain is cruel, I'm living in a cruel state of being, a state when I am no longer capable of helping even myslef. Please shoot me now.
Oh, god, why do I have to be such a self centered pig?! Why did I post that post? Why do I try to plan things at the last minet? Why do I let me grades slip away without caring?
No ammount of blood could make me feel better now.
Please kill me, or I'll have to do it myself.

Something More

There is ALWAYS something more to aim for. I finally got my chain pants today- suprise!- I'm not allowed to wear them out of the house. I...just want so much for for my look. For my life.



God. I hate myself sometimes.

Thursday, March 20, 2008

GCFE

Genetic
Code
Freedom
Experement
"The Flock"
Tizri
Eliana
Alma
Leah
Andrea
Brigita
Ethen
Sawyer (Gilbert)
(empty)
(empty)
"Angel Experement"
Flock
Bridger (angel of death)
Grahams
Cupids
Shreaders( Flying cats)
GCFE
Angel experement
Erasers
Skales( Snake Erasers)
Maybe leif!!!

Wednesday, March 19, 2008

Swinging is soooooo much fun!!

I sat at the top of a hill, in a snowstorm, swinging for two and half hours on monday. Belive me, I had brought along and jacket and a sweater and a shirt, but I tore all these off once I was in the air, because ohmigod, there is nothing like the freedom of swinging in a snowstorm. Swinging without your legs is also way fun- just shift your abs to propel yourself forward. (Don't worry- I still had on a tank top, I wasnt nude). My mom FLIPPED when she saw me, she made me take a shower the second I walked in the door. Once I reached the mirror I saw why. I was sooo red, almost purple, all over. A note for those of you who freeze like this in the future- DONT TAKE A SHOWER. ANY kind of water, hot or cold, will sting like hell. I ended up plugging all the air vents and the door, then turning the shower to full heat blast and letting the room get steamier than a suana. That felt sooooo good, I stayed in the misty bathroom for almost an hour.

I started a new book 2day. No telling what it's about yet, you'll se ;)

I swing on an average for 2-3 hours every day now. Does that count as a workout or should I still go 2 the gym?